Pressure? Schmessure!

     DO YOU STILL FEEL PRESSURE TO CONFORM?  IF NO, AT WHICH AGE DID IT STOP? I think there is always some pressure to conform; society doesn't like having to open another box into which it must categorize things.  The less variation in people, the smaller variety of labels society's printer has to pit out, the happier 'society' is. It has, however, been ... a lot of years ... oh, ok, DECADES since I gave a rat's you-know-what about 'fitting in'.  Am I going to pull a Lady Godiva anytime soon?  Not likely.  (Collective sighs of relief all around.)   My maternal grandfather wanted to be a banker.  His parents wanted him to be a lawyer.  He became a lawyer.  He also became an alcoholic. My father was a chemical engineer.  He would have rather, at least in later life, have done something in investments.  He stayed a chemical engineer because: a) he was good at it; b) people expected him to stay the course, and c) it paid well.  My father came home early from work one day in early February 1979 because he did not feel well.  One week later, he died at the age of 47. Three times after my father passed away, my mother's brother came to visit us.  Each time my mother and uncle visited me at the place where I worked.  Each time, my uncle said, "You can do better." I really owe a debt of gratitude to the men in my family, although I can't say I appreciated the lesson at the time.  I've come out of class with a good idea of what makes me happy, the ability to express what makes me happy and why, and a thick enough skin to resist efforts to fit this square peg into a round hole.

From Pillar to Post

  

WHO PUTS THE MOST PRESSURE ON YOU - YOURSELF OR OTHERS?
There is pressure that is imposed upon us by others.  Then there is PRESSURE that is imposed upon us by others.  Maybe a boss brings a last-minute project for an important deadline.  Maybe a child comes home and announces they need  six dozen cookies - for tomorrow.  (Of course, these days, you can't bring homemade goodies to public schools anymore.  But that's another post for another day.)  Then there is pressure like our soldiers face in battle.  Or the pressure put on a victim during the commission of a crime by another person.
Then there is the pressure we put on ourselves.  Then there is the PRESSURE we put on ourselves.  We may put off studying for a test or save an assignment until the last day ... when we had the time to do it in a less rushed manner.  Then there are occasions when we convince ourselves that a certain outcome is the only thing that will satisfy us and we are devastated when it doesn't come to pass.
Of course, I believe that it is not so much the source of pressure, but our reaction to it that makes the difference.  And no matter from where the pressure comes, there are usually things we can do to counteract it.  Unfortunately, there are some situations that put pressure on us over which we have no control.  When I faced such a situation at a former job, I knew I would most likely wind up injured at some point due to the nature of the job, and I made peace with that.  Then the fear, the stress and the pressure mediated itself and I was much more relaxed in the stressful situation itself.  
I'd love it if you could share a tip for how you handle pressure in your lives.  There's someone out there who needs to hear your tip today!

You'll Feel a Little Pressure

    

HAVE YOU EVER TRIED ACUPRESSURE TO TREAT A PROBLEM?  WHAT WAS YOUR EXPERIENCE WITH IT?
Before my oldest child was born, I was in a course that would have lead to certification as a professional massage therapist.  Then I developed sciatica while I was pregnant and could no longer stand long enough at one time to give a massage, so that kind of went by the wayside.
One of the classes I took was in acupressure.  We learned all the meridians and names of the pressure points.  I have used several over the years, especially as relates to dental and sinus issues.  It works as well as anything else I have tried.  The more you believe it can help you, the more likely that will actually come to pass.
The class instructor was also a licensed acupuncturist and demonstrated that one evening in class on a volunteer.  I forget what his particular problem was, but she inserted the needles at various points along his spinal column.  I know that stimulating the various points is supposed to improve the flow of "chi" in the body.  But I was still surprised when there was a faint reddish line that developed in between the needles.
And, hey, if it didn't work, would it have been in use for thousands of years?  I think not.
What is the alternative therapy that has provided you the most benefit?  I'd be thrilled to see your answer in a comment!

Breaking the Camel's Back

  
A PRESSURE POINT TRANSLATES IN JAPANESE TO "TENDER SPOT".  WHAT ARE YOUR PRESSURE POINTS?
Friends and family, in general.  Children (especially my own), animals, or those unable to protect themselves.
I've told my children on more than one occasion that I don't like guns.  I could live happily if I never had to see one, let alone have to hold one in my hands.  On the other hand, if someone tries to get into our house and harm my family, I would not hesitate to use a gun to protect my family.  Someone messing with my kids will send me from 0 to crazy in half a heartbeat.
I'm also not too fond of people harassing or bullying animals or human adults/children ... any animate thing that is not as capable of protecting or defending him or herself than the 'average' person whatever that may be.  For four years, I worked in a residential/training facility for adults with MR/DD (mental retardation and developmental disabilities).  On more than one occasion I have stepped in between two fighting individuals or close enough to one person intent on harming herself to sustain injury myself.  Strangely enough, before that job, I probably would not have put myself in harm's way.
It's not that I'm any more heroic than I was before, I just have a clearer definition of situations for which I will or will not stand

Good Pressure, Nice Pressure

  
CAN PEER PRESSURE BE POSITIVE?  WHY OR WHY NOT?
Of course pressure can be positive.  The word pressure, like the word stress, often gets a bad rap (?) in today's world.  it all has to do with our perception of the pressure's source and an analysis of their motives.
This last year, I got a pressure cooker, which had never had before.  It takes a big ole hunk of beef or pork and turns it into very tender, cut-with-your-fork meat and a tasty part of a meal.  That's a good pressure.  But, of course, the pressure cooker is an inanimate object, and I've never felt the necessity to assign motives to its actions in my corner of the space-time continuum.
If we turn to the realm of minerals, there is the fact that pressure and time can turn a hunk of coal into a diamond.  I'd rather have a bracelet of teeny diamonds than of teeny pieces of coal.  Anyone?
How about friends nudging you back into the dating world an appropriate time after a bad break-up?  Depending on how badly you were burned, that first step back can be nearly impossible to take on your own.  (Like the season I worked at an Amazon warehouse and had to slide my feet along the floor because I could not pick them up off the ground.  but that's another story).
So, a little well-intentioned peer pressure can cause us to focus on our project or goal, and get to the pot of gold sooner.  And like some of my neighbors say, "Ain't nothin' wrong with that."

Tapping to My Own Drummer

   TELL US ABOUT A TIME WHEN YOU DIDN'T BEND TO PEER PRESSURE, AND YOU SWAM AGAINST THE STREAM. When I started college, wa-a-a-ay back in 1979 (how many of you, I wonder, are saying, "Gee, I wasn't even born then!" *lol*)  I was a Musical Theatre Major-Acting Emphasis.  One term I had ballet, tap and jazz dance at the same time.
I was actually fairly thin until puberty hit and when it did, it hit the fan as well.  I have struggled with my weight since then.  Add to that the fact that my ankles have never been particularly strong and all those dance classes (with about 50% dance majors) could be very intimidating at times.  The ballet class wasn't too bad.  The instructor was helpful and understanding...except on Mondays, when she turned into the "stretch Nazi".
The tap class was a different story.  The instructor was a choreographer and was known for his hard critique of people's performances.  At one point in each class session, we would do a certain tap step in groups of four from one corner of the room to the other.
One day he demonstrated a combination of steps he wanted the class to do.  The first group did the right movements, but on the wrong count (flapping when they were supposed to be shuffling, or something like that).  The second quartet followed suit, as did each group that followed.  Maybe it was the math side of my brain, but I noticed that it wasn't as the instructor had demonstrated.
With each passing moment until my group got to the front of the line, I waffled between "I'm going to do the steps correctly,"  to "Everyone will think I'm stupid, I'll just follow the crowd," and back again.  
When the last group had gone across the floor and we were all back in line again, the instructor stopped the music and looked at the class. "There was one student who did the steps correctly," he said.  I'm not sure if he was more shocked that a non-dance major of questionable grace and agility got the step right, or that she had the gumption to do it differently from everyone else.  Or maybe I ruined his ability to yell at the whole class.  (I'm going for one of the former options, though.)
That was a good day.

Peer Pressure

  
TELL US ABOUT A TIME YOU BENT TO PEER PRESSURE. I had to do a little brain-wracking on this one.   I suppose I could use the occasion of my first 'party' in  high school.  My friend's parents were out of town and she was going to have a party.  So I went.  So there was whiskey sour punch.  I had some ... to fit in.  It tasted awful.  (Of course, this was the first time I had had anything more than beer - but I never liked the taste of that either.) There weren't many people there, so another friend and I went up a nearby canyon to a keg party to find some more people.  I got separated from this friend - there was a band playing there, and a fair amount of chaos - but we met up again and went back to the house.  More folks were there when we got back, including some mutual friends. I remember going into the downstairs bathroom and locking the door.  In hindsight that was a very good thing, because I think I passed out on the floor.  I woke to someone knocking on the door and stumbled out, and some of the friends being in the room and sniggering a bit.  Later I fell asleep on a couch in the living room. The next morning, I woke up from a telephone call from my parents telling me to come home so we could go to church.  Yikes! I had a choir practice later that day, where I was the accompanist.  A few friends who had been there the night before came walking in and just laughed when they saw me. Dumb, dumb, dumb!  (But at least that was the only time it happened.)

Procrastination: The Death of Progress

  

DO YOU HAVE A TENDENCY TO PROCRASTINATE, OR DO YOU LIKE CHECKING THINGS OFF YOUR TO-DO LIST?
Good morning.  My name is LuAnn.  ("Hi, LuAnn.")  I am a procrastinator.  
When I think of where I could be in my life if I did not procrastinate (or did less of it), it makes me want to scream.  But letting that weigh me down, on top of everything else in life that vies for my time and attention, would be fruitless.  The good news is, though, that I do not have to say that way.  That's one reason I like this time of year.  Although you don't need to wait until the New Year to start goals or habits, there seems to be this quantum sense of hope and renewal.
To compound the problem, I love making lists of things to check off.  It is one of my strengths; I made some dang good plans!  But sometimes it is also a source of procrastination, in that I will make so many or such long lists that I forestall actually beginning the project.
But the past has passed.  It can't be changed.  There is hope, however.  Time does not appear to be ending anytime soon, so if you are not satisfied with the way things are going in your life, you can change.  Let me repeat that.  You.  Can.  Change.
For instance, my desk has needed attention for some time now.  Today, I can change that.  Check back tomorrow to hold me accountable?
And what about you?  What is one small thing you could do today that would move you toward one of your goals?  Let me know in the comments?  
*+*+*+*+* Notice the 2nd button at the top of the post?  Jeff Goins is running a "500 Words a Day" writing challenge during the month of January.  Click that l'il ole button for all the info and to sign up!

Life's Little Pressure Cooker

WHAT ARE YOU CURRENTLY FEELING PRESSURE TO DO THAT YOU DON'T PARTICULARLY ENJOY? Use the button above to connect with NaBloPoMo (National Blog Posting Month) on BlogHer!
This one is easy...so to speak.  
We are experiencing a end-of-the-old-year cash crunch and it looks like I will have to ask my brother for some money from our mother's estate, something I desperately do NOT want to do.  But it is the lesser of two evils.
Even though I've signed up for UMPTEEN reading challenges for 2014 and two month-long blogging link-ups, I don't feel pressure from those, despite my, oh, less-than-stellar record in that respect.  But then, I took more time beforehand to plan my 'attack' and I'm sure that helped.
I had been feeling pressure to do all the cooking around here.  Wierd, I know.  A wife and mother who, oh, is kitchen-differently-abled?  But hubster has cooked supper for the last two days.  Should I be worried?  *lol*
Enough about me.
Leave a comment (or a vent) about something you feel pressured to do that is not enjoyable.  Or a way you have dealt with pressure in the past that has worked for you.  
Thanks for reading!

Working Well Under Pressure

Melissa at NaBloPoMo on BlogHer asks, "DO YOU WORK WELL UNDER PRESSURE?"

Well, yes and no.

I think some pressure helps, what they call in psychology, 'eustress'.  For example, I have acted in quite a number of stage plays.  There is a certain amount of stress encountered on opening night.  After all, it is the culmination of six to eight weeks of work.  Most actors have a 'day job' as well, or go to school - in other words, a life full of obligations.  You want the audience to enjoy the play.  You want to remember your lines and cues.  And when you come off the stage for the first time on opening night, there's a lot of fist-pumping, end-zone style dancing going on.  Eustress spurs you on to greater accomplishments and satisfaction.

Distress, the opposite of eustress, well ... sucks.  I remember one day, on the way to my job at a residential facility for adults with MR/DD, stopping in at the doctor's office for some samples of one of my medications.  They refused to see me due to a small, unpaid bill.  I left the crowded office in tears.  By the time I got to work, I knew my blood pressure was dangerously high.  Before reporting, I asked the cottage nurse to check my blood pressure.  She took the reading, and then went to get her supervisor.  The supervisor confirmed it at 212/120.  I tried to call my husband because they wanted to take me to the hospital.  I could not dial my phone and was having trouble talking.

The tricks, if you can call them that, is to:

- prepare for challenges as best you can.

- find a way to vent your stress (which is probably different for everybody) so it doesn't affect your health.

So after all that, to answer Melissa's question - I believe I do work well under pressure, for the most part.  Whatever the situation, I can usually hold it together until the crisis is past.  After the pressure dissipates, how hard and for how long I crash depends on how I have prepared myself beforehand and how well I am able to vent the pressure.

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What about you?  Do you work well under pressure?  What is your best stress-relief tip?  Leave a comment and let us know!