Monday, September 21, 2015
Teach us how to do something with a how-to lesson.
How to Make Sausage Gravy - Kentucky Mamaw Style
1. Wake up before dawn.
2. Swear because it's still dark out.
3. While getting dressed, swear because you're getting old.
4. Get out your ingredients (sausage, flour, milk, extra oil if needed).
5. Brown your sausage in a cast-iron skillet (and swear at all those new-fangled frying pans that don't do the job 'proper'.
6. If there isn't enough grease add a little bit, to give the flour something to hold onto, all the time vowing not to get that brand of dang sausage again because it doesn't have enough dang fat.
7. Add a couple handfuls of flour, stirring the entire time.
8. If the gravy scorches, swear, clean out the pan and go back to step #4.
9. When you get past step #8, add milk almost to the top of the skillet.
10. Swear at your young'uns (grandkids) to get their lazy *ahem* bones outta bed.
11. Put the flour and milk back where you got them from with one hand, because your other dang hand is still stirring the gravy, and you surely don't want to have to go back to step #4 at this point. You might have to swear if you did that.
12. Get a bowl for your favorite grandson because he likes to eat his gravy separately from his biscuits. Get plates and fresh-baked home-made biscuits for everyone else. Swear at your ex-daughter-in-law (in absentia) for using those store bought frozen kind.